The reviews for Red One are sure to be like a holiday lump of coal for everyone involved, but especially for Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson who has spent recent days explaining behavior that must have him on Santa’s naughty list. But don’t let them completely drive you away from this surprisingly action-packed Christmas spectacle, with loads of CGI stuffed into its stocking and the most chiseled Saint Nick since Hulk Hogan’s Santa with Muscles. While the yuletide sentiments are thin as store brand egg nog, cool visuals, clever twists on Christmas mythology, and a fully committed ensemble make for a gift worth unwrapping.
Red One instantly feels like a movie designed for Johnson by Johnson, like pretty much all of his projects do. He reunites with Jumanji director Jake Kasdan and Hobbs & Shaw writer Chris Morgan, playing the colorfully named sourpuss Callum Drift. He’s the bulky head of security for Santa Claus, played by JK Simmons who is clearly still on his Justice League workout plan. This lean ‘n mean Santa loves getting out there with the people, posing as a mall Santa to take requests in person. But Drift has had enough. He’s no longer got the Christmas spirit, thanks to those pesky adults who have forgotten what it means to be a kid. Santa is cheerful and hopeful as ever, but Drift is ready to retire.
Chris Evans co-stars as Jack O’Malley, a roguish gambling addict nicknamed “The Wolf” for his ability to find anyone in the world no matter where they’re hiding. His jaundiced view of Christmas was established early on, and now firmly etched onto the naughty list, Jack will do anything for his own selfish purposes. Jack’s so self-absorbed he’s estranged from his son who is starting to have the same cynical attitude as his daddy. Completely oblivious to pretty much everything, Jack ends up helping a mysterious band of criminals, led by a sneering Kiernan Shipka, to find the North Pole and kidnap Santa.
You’re probably imagining the North Pole as an icy village full of igloos and gingerbread cottages, but not in the universe of Red One! Instead, it’s a red and green glowing metropolis, with talking polar bears and other folkloric creatures working alongside Drift in the E.L.F., basically Santa’s security team. The government is in on this operation, too, with Lucy Liu in a supporting role as Zoe Harlowe, head of the Mythological Oversight and Restoration Authority (M.O.R.A.). When Santa gets Santa-napped, they spring into action and find Jack rather quickly. So much for being elusive. They force the”Level 4 naughty-lister” into working with Drift to identify and locate the culprits. Cue the buddy comedy hijinks.
Fueled by adrenaline and testosterone, Red One is like a kid who got his hands on Santa’s bag of gifts. From flying rocket-powered sleighs to laser guns and Drift’s ability to turn any toy into a life-sized functioning replica, there’s no shortage of stuff happening everywhere, often too much. It’ll keep the kiddos’ attention, for sure, especially if you see the film in 4DX where you feel every rumble, punch, and blast of frigid air.
It’s clear that Red One has aspirations of a holiday cinematic universe, with M.O.R.A. functioning as its version of SHIELD, and Drift as an elven Captain America of sorts. As such, there’s a fleshing out of this universe through fun twists on Icelandic legend. Quirky Game of Thrones actor Kristofer Hivju plays the goat-like Krampus, Santa’s estranged bro who spends his time in slap fights at his Mos Eisley cantina-esque home. We even see the infamous Christmas witch Grýla, who in the old stories would pursue naughty children and eat them for supper. Her aims here aren’t quite so gruesome. Like all of the female characters (including Bonnie Hunt’s Mrs. Claus), she cedes most of her time to the men. That includes the best supporting cast member of them all, Nick Kroll, who bugs out as Ted, a criminal middle-manager and death-squad leader who finds himself possessed by Grýla and eventually prey from a trio of deadly snowmen.
This is all very silly and Red One knows it. This is a family-friendly Christmas movie, after all, so we know there’s a heart of gold buried in Jack’s stubborn heart, and that Drift will find his smile again. Not to be confused with Johnson’s overhyped Netflix actioner Red Notice, it nevertheless has the generic, mass-produced feel of a streaming mockbuster. And perhaps it’ll end up as a Prime Video novelty for Amazon MGM after its theatrical run. You could do worse than to have this playing in the background during family dinner over Thanksgiving or Christmas. If there’s anything that we know about Christmas movies, it’s that they last forever. Even if we forget about them eleven months out of the year, they come roaring back to memory every December, the way Bad Santa or Elf do without fail. Like it or not, Red One is going to be a tradition in a lot of households, so you might as well grab some milk and cookies and enjoy it.
Red One opens in theaters on November 15th.
